I heard a story a while back about a wedding that was set to take place on a Saturday in California. The bride, groom, and a lot of the guests lived in the midwest. A few days before the wedding, the groom had a bachelor party with strippers. At the end of the night, he was arrested for having sex with one of the strippers outside of the place they were at. He spent the night in jail, his story made the headlines and became widely known, the bride called the wedding off, and a lot of people had wasted money on a plane ticket to California, with no wedding to go to. This isn’t the first story I’ve heard of this kind, but one that ended especially badly. Turns out a wild bachelor party may not be the best way to prepare yourself for married life. Who knew? Please share any stories you have the involve bachelor or bachelorette parties that had disasterous effects on a relationship, or on your feelings about them in general.
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OK, so I’ve been to a good many bachelor parties and they all involved naked bodies. Most of them didn’t turn into a disaster right then and there.
There was one friend that went off on a weekend bachelor party in Las Vegas, one week prior to getting married. The guest list of men that went with him was a Player’s Club register of unfaithful men. I did not attend and heard back that it was all drinking, sex and gambling like there was no tomorrow. Everyone had sex with someone. The bride went off on her own trip and rumor has it that they were likely as bad.
The night before the wedding, my friend stayed out all night, drinking the dubious mixture of Red Bull & vodka. He then ran a 10k.
As I stood there waiting for the bride to enter the room, looking at my friend – I asked my wife if she thought my friend was actually breathing. He looked like death warmed over.
After the ceremony, I was trying to make my way over to the bridal table to pay my respects and best wishes. But, the groom was not there. Finally, after about an hour’s absence, word comes back that the groom has “flu-like” symptoms and is upstairs in the hotel room.
So, the bride goes through the entire wedding dinner on her own.
At this point, we’re laying money on whether this marriage makes it 12 months. It lasted about 24. During that time, both parties were unfaithful. They had a child and now share custody.
I won’t blame the bachelor party but I will say that it was clear by the tenor of that event, that this thing was DOA.
I went to another wedding where the groom got in huge trouble by telling his deeply religious bride that he went to a strip club. I did attend that event and believe me – that mope did nothing even remotely risque. I had girls lined up to dance for me, while the groom & best man were sitting on their hands. He just talked to them after closing time over a coke.
Then, he goes back to his bride and confesses that he went into that place. She threw him out of the house, declared the wedding canceled. He went to the best man’s hotel room in tears. The best man went to assure the bride that it was all somehow my fault (another story, but I honestly couldn’t care less: she already hated me). Someplace around 7am, the bride shows up at the best man’s hotel, they pow-wow in the parking lot for an hour and eventually drive away. He got in trouble for doing nothing and those two are still married, a decade later.
I kind of think that the pressure cooker of marriage is going to show people’s maturity and emotional balance. It’s certainly going to test it. People in a relationship need to communicate their expectations and the more they don’t do this, the more likely that some blow-up is to occur. Whether that’s before or after the wedding is almost irrelevant.
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